In Other News…

Today is Keyven’s one-month birthday.  For some reason, I’ve just noticed in the past couple of days how big he is getting.  When we were at the hospital earlier this week, they weighed him and he’s at 9 pounds, 14 ounces, which is right on track for a breastfeeding baby after the initial birth weight loss.

It’s kind of mind-boggling to know that I’m producing all of his food & nutrients.  And, as much as he eats, it’s sometimes hard to eat enough myself.  Breastfeeding really is the best post-partum diet — I’m now at 12 pounds less than my pre-pregnancy weight.  Due to a little remaining swelling on my c-section incision, I’m not totally comfortable in a lot of my “before” pants, but I did get to put on my favorite jeans this week.

I think I’m adjusting well mentally to motherhood and all the changes going on in our lives right now, but it was touch and go for a while there.  I’m pretty sure it was just my hormones getting back in line but some days I spent most of the day crying over everything.  Not just things like the birth not going as planned and Tim leaving either.  Things like rheumatoid arthritis commercials… I remember thinking that I couldn’t imagine raising a child in a world so horrible that people have to take medicine just to be able to tie their shoes.  Then I would cry because Keyven was crying and I felt like he would never stop and I wasn’t doing anything good enough.  And that’s all just normal hormonal fun!

Now that I’m (mostly) over the hormonal roller coaster, I get to enjoy snuggling up my little papoose and watching his little funny faces while he sleeps.  He notices lights a lot now and has started using his hands more — grabbing me, clothes, hair, his own ears, and sucking on his fingers when I’m just not fast enough for him.  “Happy baby time” (my phrase for those all-too-short periods where he’s content to just lay in my lap and take in the world instead of rooting for a snack or fussing about something else) is on the rise and we’re eagerly anticipating the arrival of real baby smiles.